Have you tried being inspired by yourself?
I was exchanging messages and told someone how inspiring they are. Then caught myself thinking: Why is it always others who inspire me?
Riley Keough, the granddaughter of Elvis Presley, once recalled going through his books with her mother, Lisa Marie. His favourite books were self-help and the Bible, all full of notes.
Elvis. The man who changed music didn’t seem to be enough of an inspiration for himself. Well, dear Elvis, I respectfully disagree.
Why We’re Drawn to What We Already Carry?
Carl Jung believed that much of what inspires us in others is not random admiration but recognition.
When someone moves or challenges us, Jung would say we are often meeting a part of ourselves we haven’t fully claimed yet. Our “shadow”, the parts of us that were hidden, undeveloped or pushed aside because they didn’t feel acceptable, safe or rewarded early on.
But what if these parts don’t always have to be “dark”? Sometimes we admire courage in others because our own courage learned to stay quiet. It is still there, resonating with the courage of the person who we seem to be moved by.
Jung believed growth doesn’t happen by imitation. It happens when we bring back the parts of ourselves that went quiet. What we appreciate in others is often a sign of something familiar, something already ours.
This is where inspiration stops being something you chase and becomes something you recover by recognising similar parts in your own self. Because if you’re drawn to them, most likely, you already carry them.
So, Why Me?
Deciding to become an inspiration to myself may, in itself, be a defence mechanism. Perhaps a form of self-sufficiency, intellectualisation or even reaction formation.
As a therapist, I can recognise and accept this. After all, we keep the defences that help us survive until we’re strong enough to loosen them.
Of course, I wish I were extraordinary. But that isn’t my story.
My story is this: I normally show up to my work, my life, my questions even when fear is excruciating. I usually choose honesty over disappearance. I fail regularly, at times I fail better.
Pretty inspiring if you ask me.
And if you’re reading this, I bet you that you’re inspiring too!
Not in the way we’re taught to notice. Not in ways that make headlines. But in the small, ordinary ways you keep making your life work.
That’s often where inspiration really lives.